Valentines Schmalentines

Well. It's here. Again.

Valentine's Day.

Like many people, I've had a love/hate relationship with this holiday. The "love" phase came in elementary school when I got to decorate a shoe box and all my classmates gave me candy. Plus my mom threw me a Valentine bunko party one year that RULED.

The "hate" phase came soon after. My dating career began at age 15 with a month-long "relationship" that missed V-Day by a few weeks. This "relationship" held the record for my longest official dating situation until I was 24. During the intervening years, I pretty much dated boys for a week then was over it. People who follow a similar dating patern must come to terms with these three truths: 1) You're dating the wrong people. 2) You have commitment issues. 3) You don't have Valentines. Ever.

So went my life.

In middle school and high school I coveted the ugly, cheap teddy bears my friends received from their boyfriends and wrote angst-ridden posts on my Xanga.

In college, there was wine.

Last year, I intentionally booked my Australian vacation so that I essentially didn't exist on Valentine's Day 2013. I had just started dating my now boyfriend and we were in that awkward stage of "do we mention the elephant in the room or just avoid Valentine's Day altogether?" My solution was to flee the country. My plane left L.A. on February 13 and arrived in Sydney on February 15. I'm not sure where February 14, 2013 disappeared to on my 15-hour flight across the Pacific, but I didn't miss it. At all.

Now, at age 25, I've finally scored my first Valentine that isn't my mother. However, that Valentine is someone who thinks that Valentine's Day was a ploy dreamed up by Hallmark and Russel Stover to force people to celebrate something they should already be celebrating every day. So, we won't be going big. I'm not allowed to spend money on anything Valentine's related and as of 8:52 p.m. on February 13, I have zero Valentine's Day plans aside from laying eyes on this goob. And that's just fine with me.

To all of you who aren't in good standing with V-Day, I'm not going to say "You'll find someone when you least expect it" or "You're such a catch" or "They don't know what they're missing." Ugh. Gag me.

Here is my promise to you:

  • I promise not to add to the flood of bouquet/chocolate/etc. pictures you're about to see on Facebook.
  • I promise not to roll my eyes or grimace if you refer to "S.A.D. Day."
  • I promise to refrain from mushy lovey talk (unless referencing Roxanne).
  • I promise to give you a hug if you need it.
  • I promise not to give you advice about your love life.
  • And I promise to share my secret stash of candy with you.

Whatever your Valentine situation, I sincerely hope someone makes you feel special and loved today and every day. Also, these are for you:

Happy Valentine's Day!

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